Ladies: STOP F*CKING AROUND
Thanks to Urbanite for this harsh telling it as it is to kick off our 2006. Come on everyone – let’s get it together. Ladies – take a read: This was what greeted returning holidaymakers dragging their feet back into the golden province of Gauteng on a slow Sunday: Stop F*cking Around! (see even I can’t write it in full!) These eloquent headlines were dotted randomly all over …the streetpoles loudly welcoming everyone back to the crazy city of Johannesburg: Stop F*cking Around! My immediate reaction was that it must have been the brazen New Year’s Resolution for 2006 of just about anyone that had as k*k a year as nearly every other citizen in 2005. Sunday being papers-in-bed day, I handed the offending tabloid to the cashier along with the other more respectable suspects, keen to read more. Much to my surprise and then delight, for once the f-word was not being used as if often is, to mean “doing, action, very” etc. This time it was being used in it’s most impactful and explicit meaning: to have sex. Paging eagerly to the offending column, I was disappointed to discover that the semantics of the article just didn’t touch the attention-grabbing antics of the headlines – it was a fairly subdued and sobre telling off actually. An anti-climax of note. The article embodied a message from Dr Irvin Khoza, urging all the bling bling young sexy PSL soccer players and specifically Bafana Bafana to take it easy and stop sleeping around or else they wouldn’t live to see the 2010 World Cup Soccer. A classic quote from the article: “I plead that they stop driving to Southgate Mall (south of Jozi) in their latest sports cars with the sole aim of impressing young girls and eventually having unprotected sex with them.” The fact is that the HIV/Aids pandemic in our country has long since passed the “softly softly tip-toe” approach, there’s no time to play and we need to cut straight to the chase as far as communication, messaging and language are concerned. I am no prude, however my feeling is that the discretion of the Sunday Sun newspaper and it’s editorial team must be questioned for crossing an invisible yet respected rule in journalism: not to be vulgar, crude and downright pavement trashy where possible – always maintain a level of decency and journalistic integrity. Right now I can think of quite a few fabulous soft-blow expletives that could have done a very similar job: humping, pomping, sleeping, pimping, shagging etc. WHY did they decide to go with “F*cking” on the front page? The question must be...
You’ve GOTH to be joking.
What a boring place we would live in if everyone dressed the same. You have to love South Africa and it’s diversity. Check out this introduction to ‘Goths’ and the Goth culture. Have you ever wondered what those white people are all about that dress from head to toe in black and wear black eyeliner and have black punk shaven hair or long shaggy hair usually dressed in torn tight… jeans and t-shirts and a scary black long jacket? Especially the old ones with black painted nails that look like they need a good style makeover and to grow up a bit? Some people would vehemently label them as Goth’s, part of the ‘Gothic’ music scene and underground culture – they may be correct – or not. But don’t we live in a country that encourages tolerance and understanding? Last time we checked we were all supposed to not judge each other but instead respect people to liive and dress the way they like. So in order to do that, we need to understand what people are all about – so we tried to find out a bit on what being a Goth means – these are just snippets – click on the link to read more about them: REBELLION “Historically, the Goth scene grew out of the post-Punk movement of the late 1970s. The separation of the two was brought about, in the main, by youth from materially-secure, well-educated families. They saw Punk as a way of revolting against the perceived mind-boggingly-boring and indifferent life of their parents. Pretty rapidly discovering that they couldn’t hack Punk’s extroverted lifestyle, these people went on to create their own sub-culture. Their rebellion was not political or social – it was an aesthetically-inspired one – creating a gothic lifestyle. Since the mid-nineties, after a decline at the end of the eighties and perhaps spurred on by ‘pre-millennial tension’, the Goth scene has undergone something of a revival – gigs are frequently well-attended, and there are a fair number of ‘big’ bands on the Goth scene, although few have enjoyed real commercial success. It is frequently argued that commercialisation of Goth events destroys what is referred to as the ‘family’. These events are, at times, called ‘family gatherings’… a family which does not mind that there are more black than white sheep in it.” “The whole Goth movement is intimately linked to music. But you cannot understand Goth music if you do not know what the very heart of Goth is about. COOL AND DISTANT Those in the Goth scene tend to view the Goth concept rather as an expression of individuality, something...
Good for a laugh – Do we have lions in our streets?
Thanks to Mich for sending this on to us, it’s an old one but worth a good laugh… Hopefully sites like Represent and others will be enlightening the world to the real Africa. Questions about South Africa were posted on a South African Tourism Website and were answered by the website owner. Q: Does it ever get windy in South Africa? I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do th…e plants grow? (UK) A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die. Q: Will I be able to see elephants in the street? (USA) A: Depends how much you’ve been drinking or sniffing. Q: I want to walk from Durban to Cape Town – can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden) A: Sure, it’s only two thousand kilometres. Take lots of water. Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in South Africa? (Sweden) A: So it’s true what they say about Swedes. Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in South Africa? Can you send me a list of them in JHB, Cape Town, Knysna and Jeffrey’s Bay? (UK) A: What did your last slave die of? Q: Can you give me some information about Koala Bear racing in South Africa? (USA) A: Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific. A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe which does not… oh forget it. Sure, the Koala Bear racing is every Tuesday night in Hillbrow. Come naked. Q: Which direction is north in South Africa? (USA) A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get there and we’ll send the rest of the directions. Q: Can I bring cutlery into South Africa? (UK) A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do. Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys’ Choir schedule? (USA) A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is. oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Hillbrow, straight after the Koala Bear races. Come naked. Q: Do you have perfume in South Africa? (France) A: No, WE don’t stink. Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in South Africa? (USA) A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather. Q: Can you tell me the regions in South Africa where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy) A: Yes, gay nightclubs. Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in South Africa? (France) A: Only at Christmas. Are there killer bees in South...
The Gayness of being Gay
RichieRich has to be our youngest citizen journalist yet – he’s 16 years old and got in touch with us looking for a forum to share his thoughts – BRAVO RichieRich for speaking your mind… So people… what’s your take? Watch RichieRich’s star keep rising – hope you’re thinking of politics! The on going debate whether or not to allow homosexual men into the priesthood was ended… this week when a Vatican Newspaper denounced homosexuals as narcissistic immature “manipulators” in a commentary in support of the banning of homosexual men entering the priesthood. The commentary came after a publication of an instruction by Pope Benedict the sixtieth banning Bishops from ordaining homosexuals into the priesthood. Yesterday however the Constitutional Court of South Africa ruled in favor of Same Sex Marriages allowing members now of the same sex to wed. The court has given the Government exactly one year to enact the new legislation which now states that homosexual couples hold the same rights as heterosexual couples it also states now that homosexual couples will have the same status, entitlements and responsibilities as that of heterosexual couples. Although some may now argue especially those associated with the Catholic Church that marriage should be associated with a man and a women.I do believe that all church doors of all religions should be opened to everyone. Earlier on in the year Zulu King Goodwill Zwelithini stated that to be homosexual is un-African and would pose a threat towards the Zulu nation. I believe as a society we need to learn to accept people for “who” they are and not “what” they are. I believe that homosexuals deserve just like everyone else equal rights before the law and need to be respected, wait I do believe there is a word for it &&&”democracy” yes that’s it. We have been living in a democratic society now for eleven years yet there are still those who seem to attach a stigma to those who are attracted to members of the same sex and label them as individuals who go about doing things in a specific way like dressing and talking in such a way. The constant reminder that it is against all major religious beliefs I find amusing and if religion is going to be brought into this topic then I am sure that in the Bible it states that you shall not judge others. Does it not also state that if you give your life to God and believe in him then you will be promised a place in his kingdom? At the end of the day who exactly are we to judge another...
JOHN LEGEND is on his way with MTV BASE!
Now this is what we call a true ‘DAY MAKER’ – it’s a little like a ‘REG MAKER’. after a long day you’re updating the site with the usual good bits and pieces and then you get something that really makes your day. This time it’s in the form of the INCREDIBLE musician John Legend who is on his way to perform in SA (yes, breathe deeply fans…) And the best …news is that it is around the corner – DECEMBER! And even better, it’s a three city tour = Jozi, CT and Durbs! 3-city concert tour to hit Joburg 15th, Cape Town 16th & Durban 18th December US soul sensation John Legend is coming to South Africa for the first time to headline at MTV base LIVE! an exclusive 3-city concert tour proudly supported by communications leader Nokia. The multi-talented singer, songwriter, pianist and producer will perform in Johannesburg, Cape Town and Durban in December 2005 as the last leg of MTV base LIVE! the pan-African tour which has rocked Accra, Kampala, Nairobi, Dar es Salaam, Lagos and Luanda in recent months. Kicking off with a concert at the Standard Bank Arena on 15 December, Kanye West discovery John Legend will thrill Jo’burg music fans with his own special brand of feelgood soul, before moving on to Cape Town’s Bellville Vellodrome on 16 December and Durban’s Westridge Tennis Stadium on 18 December for two ‘festival’ style events. In each venue, Legend will be performing tracks from his critically acclaimed 2004 album debut, Get Lift ed, where he demonstrates his rare ability to fuse classic old school soul music with the edgy flavour of hip-hop and the romantic themes of traditional R’n’B. Legend is often described as having the sensuality of Marvin Gaye, the sincerity of Stevie Wonder, the directness of Snoop Dogg and the wit of Kanye West. The MTV base LIVE! concerts will also feature a star-studded lineup of South Africa’s best artists to be revealed in the coming days. Tickets for MTV base LIVE! South Africa are on sale at all Computicket & Shoprite Checkers outlets, online at COMPUTICKET and by phone at: 011 340 8000 or 083 915 8000. Log on to MTVBASE or e-mail us at for more...
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